How many of these will we need?…

uh.. maybe.. two to five per ton of cybertronian using it.. so.. a lot

wait why do you just have that on hand

Well, think about it! If we started slipping around like that? We’d be unstoppable.

I blame Magnus.

jessicabiotech sent: "Fine. How about something else ?"

Actual high grade might not be too bad!


but why do you want your intakes to be a slip and slide

Why not?

jessicabiotech sent: "I'll pay you."

Nope. I’m not about to explain to Knocks why I thought drinking human high grade seemed like a good idea.


yeah but.. energon is a liquid anyway

how that even going to do anything

Well- I’ll be able to drink energon faster?

My intakes will be a slip and slide

jessicabiotech sent: "Why not drink whiskey and vodka. I'll buy you some bottles."

Uh. That’s human stuff. You can give that to weird me! He’ll drink that stuff up. And get sick from it, too.


How could you even smoke lube? Wouldn’t it be more drinking it? I could have extra slippery internals…
smoketopus.. no. no, drink the lube. what would you even do with extra slippery internals?

I could eat food really quickly if I did? Win all the eating contests? That’s how they win eating contests, right?


He is laughing hard enough to wheeze. “Nooo! nonono! SHHHH!” He cackled.






Snorts and snickers, then laughs loudly. “Oh Goodness! Don’t let them all hear you say that! HA!”

Well, it’s true. I can say it louder.

Anonymous sent: What about now? (Oooh tumblr why must you be so frustrating at times) (just let me send the link >_<)

Aaargh, no. But maybe you can tell me what to search? I’ll link it if I find it!


"Hmm. Welcome, Smooooookey." Grins.

If it means anything, you’re the best of the thirteen!

Anonymous sent: Did you get the fanfics link this time?

Nope. Maybe put a space where periods are? That might let you send it?



Thank you, Alphs


"This ‘story’ of inappropriate behavior on my part is getting far to out of servo. It is ridiculous." Nods with finality.

People like to think you’re some kind of dirtybot. You aren’t. Right?

(Source: highglossfinish)

Anonymous sent: I meant more smuttier then that! a fic that gets more into it on alpha outing that key in smokescreen XD

I don’t think I’ve seen that yet!